Part XIII:My Flag Ethics Cycle

Well into 1982, the New Regime (RTC) was now fully in control of the CofS. All previously autonomous networks including the Guardians Office had been reformed into one command line under the RTC. Special Unit had been whipped into line and the missions had been castrated. The RTC was putting their attention on anyone in the Scientology field who was acting independently.

I got a call from the ethics officer at FOLO WUS. I was told that the RTC had a stack of knowledge reports stating that I'd been distributing/delivering confidential material to the field, and I was ordered to Flag in Clearwater for ethics handling. Incensed by the lies and obvious ploy to get me to drop what I was doing and report to Flag, I decided to call an old friend for assistance.

Pat Broeker's ex-wife, Frannie, and I had worked closely together while I was in the FBO network. Frannie had been my senior for a while when she was CS-F (Commodore's Staff for Finance) and we had become close friends. Currently, she was holding the top post at Author Services, high up in the ranks of the RTC. I had never known her to buckle under pressure from above and she had been close to Hubbard on the ship, as I had been. Having once supported my efforts with Book One, she had given me a confidential phone number to reach her. I figured that she was the only person who could help me with this personal attack from the RTC.

I called her and told her what was going on and asked her for assistance. I was taken aback by her uncharacteristic coldness and robotic response. She told me that she could make this ethics cycle go away if I would re-join the Sea Org and come back to the fold. I could even run Book One in North America if I wanted, but I had to do it as a Sea Org member. When I informed her that I wouldn't come back to the SO, she told me that in that case, there was nothing that she could do to help me. That was the last time I spoke to Frannie.

I decided to go to Flag, but that I wasn't going alone. I asked John Galusha to accompany me and he agreed. I was extremely upset by my current circumstances and wanted someone with me on this trip who would keep me sane. Just being in his presence had a calming affect on me. None of the present insanity seemed to affect John. Additionally, during all the time we had worked together on the Book One program no one had ever attacked John. It was as if the man was outside this whole crazy game and invisible to attackers.

When we arrived at Flag it felt as if I was entering a den of insanity. I was just one of many people there for ethics handling. People were frantically routing on to KSW (Keeping Scientology Working) courses. Outside the Flag ethics office there was a long line of people that circled around the building. I was told that I had to get in line to see an ethics officer. Nervous and upset, I stayed in line most of the day. John stayed with me, calmly reading a book. People coming out of the ethics office looked harried and disoriented. Finally, it was my turn to see an ethics officer. In the office there were maybe two or three ethics officers busily haranguing people.

I sat down across from the first available ethics officer and introduced myself. He responded by saying, "So you're Mike Goldstein". I asked him about the apparent knowledge reports that said I was distributing confidential material to the field. He couldn't produce any of these reports but said that there was good reason why I was there. When I informed him that I was working on a special project under Diana Hubbard he said that the RTC had no indication or proof that I had ever worked with her. I was told that I was in big trouble and that he had to gather more information on my situation. He then ended the interview and I was told to report back later to see him. With his cold, superior and robotic attitude, I could see that this person was not interested in anything I had to say and had already made up his mind (or had had it made up for him) about me.

After leaving the ethics office, I ran into Diana who looked extremely upset and frazzled. I told her why I was there and what the ethics officer had said about there being no proof that I had ever worked with her. She said that there was nothing that she could do and just walked on.

Devastated, I went with John back to our room. Over the past year there were times when I really felt I needed a session and soloing on NOTs didn't produce the desired results. In desperation, I would go to John and he would audit me using old creative processes that he had helped Hubbard research in the 1950s. These sessions had always helped, and I certainly could use some help now. I could only remember one other time in my life when I was this upset. I asked John for a session and he wholeheartedly agreed.

One half-hour later, I had had the most effective session in my entire career as a Scientologist. The result of the session was something I could have previously never imagined. I not only moved out of my upset, but also felt I'd moved out of this whole crazy game.

Later, on my way back to the ethics office, I felt as if I was walking through a war zone, with people all around me embroiled in battle. But none of this seemed to have anything to do with me. It was as if the others were being shot and falling like flies while I was invisible and bullets were passing harmlessly through my body. I was in a state that I imagined John was in all the time.

Unscathed by my surroundings, I patiently waited in line again to see the ethics officer. Finally I was meeting with the ethics officer that I'd seen earlier, but this time I felt no malice for him, or for anyone for that matter. I really don't remember what he said to me or I said to him, but he acted differently than he had in our previous meeting. Kindness and interest in what I had to say replaced his earlier heartless demeanor. The upshot of the meeting was that not only did he believe my ethics handling should be cancelled, but also that the CofS should support my efforts! Acting as if he was just hearing about my Book One program for the first time, he excitedly scheduled another meeting outside the ethics office. The purpose of this meeting would be to brief him on my project.

The rest of my trip on Flag was very pleasant. I just walked around talking with people. I even ran into Heber Jentzsch who asked me what I was doing. After telling him, he expressed a strong interest in setting up an event for John and me.

I left Flag completely exonerated from any out-ethics.